The UVM Ski & Snowboard Club (UVMSSC) is a non-competitive, non-profit, student run organization dedicated to bringing together UVM's winter sports community and making skiing and snowboarding more accessible to UVM students. We work to encourage the already popular winter sports culture at UVM by providing discount season passes, free shuttles to the mountains, on/off-campus skiing and snowboarding film premieres and other events, group trips around the world, cheap trips around the Northeast, discounts to local businesses, proforms direct from manufacturers, and include some pretty sweet t-shirts with membership.
UVMSSC is the largest collegiate ski and snowboard club in the U.S. Our mission is to provide the UVM skiers and snowboarders with the opportunity to foster and develop relationships with the greater ski and snowboard community of Northern VT. This includes individual club members, ski resorts, sport shops, and national sponsors. It is our purpose to provide a framework by which all of these establishments can meld and become incorporated into an epic community of winter sport enthusiasts.
Ty Bears
El Presidente
If you find yourself anywhere in a wooded region in the Northern Hemisphere you would be hard pressed not to find this guy catching salmon with his mouth in a shallow river. Despite his name, Ty is sadly not a bear yet he carries himself with the same tenacity and primal instincts of a powerful Alaskan grizzly. He wields his Kendama like an ancient Samurai wields their Katana on the verge of great battle. His curly locks have inspired an entire new era of modern art origionating from Canada, which happens to be Ty’s favorite federal constitutional monarchy. Ty rules over the Ski and Snowboard Club with a well-lubricated stainless-steel iron fist.
Sammy Yohe
Graphic Design
Walking down church street you may be lured into a concert venue like a sailor drawn into rocks by a siren. Thats no siren, its Sammy "Fortnite” Yohe. She has mastered every Adobe shortcut known to mankind, even being rumored to have secret access to unreleased ones. Sammy has molded Illustrator into her own personal weapon, churning out highly-effective propaganda against her closest enemies. Once a member of a Peruvian intelligence agency, Sammy still has not one but two fake molars filled with cyanide. Capable of cable-rowing 327 pounds, Sammy can and will tear the shirt off of your back if she deems the design unsatisfactory.
Drew Smits
Communications
World renown for his ballet skills, Drew has calves that could slice clean through a watermelon while removing all the seeds at the same time. As our communications officer, he goes through three carbon-reinforced keyboards a day due to his vigorous typing at 10 words per minute (he uses only his pinkies). Afraid of large stainless steel cookware, Andrew wont step foot into a restaurant without his emotional support fingerless gloves. Drew can be used as a human jumprope like those little African kids singing Shakira. If you disagree with him, Drew will rapidly devolve into a homunculus and wont be brought back to normal until you answer five of his riddles.
Reagan Romano
Director of Social MEdia
When she isn’t training her 5 french bulldogs to tie her shoes for her (she never learned), Reagan is crafting intagram posts to feed the ravenous student body of UVM. Known as a master of hypnotism, Reagan is able to invade the mind of the average scroller, allowing her to curate the perfect brain rot that stimulates all 5 senses. Reagan can do a backflip on land with no trampoline or performance enhancers, ask her to do it in person she will do it. The only downside to SSC’s very own social media director is that she does not possess exceptional cheesemaking skills. She has decided to reject the Romano family name and personally sabotaged her Italian grandfathers cheesemaking empire before fleeing to UVM to chase her true dream of media management.
Juli Lorenzano
Ski Sponsorship Manager
The chilling Vermont breeze you feel as you walk to class or stand atop a great peak is actually Juli’s aura. She might seem innocent to our sponsorship partners, but outside of her job as an officer Juli has mastered nearly every form of self-defense. Following extensive training in the coastal mountain range of Syria (see photo), she can now crush a water balloon with just her foot as long as she is wearing really big boots, impressive I know. A passionate collector of silly pinwheel hats and lollipops, Juli is all business and no fun.
Helena Canning
Snowboard Sponsorship Manager
Following her short career as a Navy Seal, Helena decided to try a real challenge for once by becoming an SSC officer. She woos our snowboard sponsors with her ability to replicate any birdcall with a single Cheez-it and a thimble. Helena has traveled back in time on numerous occasions to ensure the well-being of wealthy children’s parents so that Batman never exists in real life (lame). When she isn’t tending to her extensive lichen collection, Helena is bouncing a tennis ball against a brick wall by herself.
Alan Misura
Clubhaus manager
Many don’t even know his name, they only recognize his chiseled mug as “the wettest guy in Memphis”. If he’s not belly-flopping into hotel pools in skinny jeans, Alan isn’t doing anything else. After cutting off the 4-foot long dutch braids he had since he was 18, Alan embarked on a spiritual journey where he discovered that managing the UVM SSC clubhaus was his lifelong calling. The voices in his head tell him that one day he will be able to overthrow the corrupt Ski Club political hierarchy and finally install a hot tub within the clubhaus. Alan ages like Benjamin Button but backwards.
Lizzy Faiola
Trips and Transportation
When asked what her most impressive feat was, Lizzy responded “I can extend my toes allowing me to swim faster”. This was a massive understatement of her own capabilities. Just last year she was pretend-mermaid champion for the 7th year in a row after breaking her own record in the breath holding contest. She passed out in the 4-foot deep competition regulation pool. This goes to show how hard Lizzy is willing to push herself to succeed, and her job as an officer is no exception. She personally simulates every club trip on a miniature scale 3 hours prior to its launch with her army of Australian walking sticks. “I just love how they look like sticks its so tubular” Lizzy says as she drinks gasoline from a sippy cup.
Gabe Davis
assistant events coordinator
SSC’s most dubious officer has easily lived up to his XBox live username “ThugThief42”. A theft spree through the pet stores of southern Nevada landed Gabe 2 hours in rehab to fix his obsession with training an army of parrots to sing like Axl Rose. A new man, Gabe settled down after his life of crime to be an officer for UVM’s most notorious club. While he will never match the thrill of running down the beach in his robe with 13 live parrots in a santa-sized sack, Gabe is more than fit to be our very own assistant events coordinator. Aside from feeding Alex Hoefer grapes and periodically fanning him with a massive palm frond, Gabe works on his cooking skills. He has succeeded in putting a rock in the oven until it becomes warm. Unlike Alex, Gabe’s elbows are actually very nice, he keeps them well moisturized and has even modeled them for prestigious modeling agencies on multiple occasions.
Lucy Rosenbluth
Pass Sales
Lucy oh lucy, how do you swoon our mountains oh so well. A bond tighter than a babys cheeks created out of proud negotiation, promptly timed emails, and love <3. Lucy spends her time looking for the ants, as they have taken her homeland and are rampaging constantly to the song "Funky Town" by Lipps inc.; because of this, be mindful as she walks through campus, her sword she carries at her side 24/7 could slice you in half (only if you are an ant of course).
Alex Hoefer
EVENTS COORDINATOR
The fact that Alex has ugly wugly elbows was no deterrent to assume the role of creating utter awesomeness like our rail jams or learn to ski and ride days. His fear of beds and couches could never throw shade on the fact that he can toss back enormous volumes of water, Mio and and and and and and in a gallon size water jug that reads “www.UVM.ssc.borg.” Alex’s bizarre, yet structured beliefs, of the giant sandworms deemed Shai-Hulud, have sent him down deep into a rabbit hole of self-discovery that can only benefit the Club’s need for a hot tub in the clubhouse (make it happen, Shuman).
Alex is forever on the run from a militia of popcorn kernels who are constantly attempting to infiltrate his gray matter. Never fear! He has equipped his bunker with a bongo and a ukulele, providing endless hours of fun and entertainment for all.
Gigi Lajeunesse
TReasurer
Oh, Canada! What on Earth were you thinking when you let Gigi go? You lost your most profish financial guru and we gained an absolute beast of a fidoosh for the SSC. Moving on, in addition to collecting Matchbox cars in her free time, Gigi is obsessively addicted to model train sets that feature full movie remakes of the Polar Express characters who come to life via USB-B connection ports to sing and serve steaming hot chocolate, sticky marshmallows, and juicy kisses.
As a steadfast Warren Buffet groupie, Gigi has sworn herself off from all Pepsi products, including the sweet-sweet, oosie-juicy, nectar of the Gods….Mountain Dew. This is utter blasphemy! Despite this heresy, SSC is confident that her depth of knowledge regarding stacks of Benjamins, the GDP and all things ROI will erect the necessary pimp juice the Club has been lacking.